The Plothole
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'''Archadmiral Lo:''' Serves her right.
 
'''Archadmiral Lo:''' Serves her right.
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[[Category:Pan Post]]

Latest revision as of 05:17, 6 August 2018

In Pan Post 129 Archadmiral Lo steers her ship, Highemperor's My B*tch into battle against X, one of the Powerplayers of the High Empire. Lo attempts to ram X with her ship but X uses her staff to hold the vessel at bay. X Powerplays her magic but Lo has ample gadgets that she has procured throughout the Multiverse, including interdimensional bullets that once belonged to the Omega Reich. Lo fires these at X and X is consumed by non-reality.

Post

CATFIGHT (Even though it only involves one cat)

The crystalline star galleon Highemp's My B*tch zooms through the void, its weaponry lay waste to all in its path. Its commander Archadmiral Lo allows herself a whoop of glee in between her barked orders - for the way to Urbis Imperia is open before her. All the fleets of the High Empire couldn't bar her from her prize; those that were in her way died, and those still behind her can't catch her before she claims her newest man-concubine, whom she sees watching from the tallest spire of the Stronghold of Powerplayers.

Archadmiral Lo: Do you hear me, Highemp?! I'm coming for you!!

A woman in a once-fine-but-now-tattered dress and face mask rises up before her, brandishing her staff.

X: Like hell, kittycat. He's MINE.

Lo barks a laugh as she allows her ship to slow down.

Archadmiral Lo: If he were truly YOUR man, you wouldn't be sharing him, now would you? You're just one of his zillion sluts.

X: He is the greatest man in all Existence and Anti-Existessence! No one woman is enough for the true measure of his virility!

Archadmiral Lo: Damn, someone's got a creepy stalker crush.

X: Says the pirate trying to kidnap him.

Archadmiral Lo: Touche. RAMMING SPEED!

The star galleon surges forward, its battering ram pointed directly at X, who meets its point with the head of her staff. The star galleon ripples with the force of the crash as it is stopped dead in its path. Its engines strain to push forward, and X huffs out her breath as she bars its path.

Archadmiral Lo: Well, well, nice trick. But look who's focusing all her power on stopping this ship...when I can set this ship to autopilot and kill you while you're busy with it?

Lo activates her jetpack and leaps up into the void to gain a better angle. Then she draws her Discharding-made flintlock pistol and fires. X darts out of the way, letting the Highemp's My B*tch--

Archadmiral Lo: After I capture Highemp, I'm going after you next, CensorGod!

--surge forward. With its engines at full power, and no hand on the helm to control it, the star galleon crashes into the gates of Urbis Imperia. Lo crows in delight at the shattered walls; while battered, her ship is still spaceworthy.

Archadmiral Lo: Now to march in there and-- Whoa!

She barely dodges as X fires a mystic bolt her way. Lo fires her pistol in response, and X deflects it with her staff. They swoop about, trading fire. X casts other spells in attempts to ensnare Lo, but Lo keeps pulling out gadgets to counter them: a compass that points to a seventeenth direction (which enables her to step out of an unbreakable net); a wind-up pistol-sized Death Star (which shears through the same constricting globe that killed Yannah); a clockwork parrot that spouts arcane gibberish in perfect anti-sync to X's spell chants, negating all her magic.

Archadmiral Lo: Looks like I've got the upper hand now.

X: Like hells. I'm a powerplayer - I don't NEED words to cast my spells!

Archadmiral Lo: What, like Imeryn? I don't think she'll be pleased to know you're stealing her shtick-- whoa!

She swoops to the side to avoid a barrage of deadly blasts. While X's ability to spellcast while silenced seems true, she is weary enough from her earlier battles that she can't cast anything too complex while silenced, mostly managing basic (but strong) force fields and mystic bolts.

Lo fires all the remaining rounds in her pistol, then reloads it with special ammo found in a secret Omega Reich cache purportedly own by Jagisk Ttocks himself. Re-cocking her pistol and dodging more mystic bolts, Lo fires in rapid succession.

Miniature versions of the Omega Reich's deadliest interdimensional missiles streak through space towards their target. X's eyes widen behind her mask, and she quickly destroys them with mystic bolts. These bullet-missiles are designed with such interception in mind, and explode when struck, their explosion still funneled to expand outward towards their intended target.

X: Highemperor preserve me!

She sheathes herself hurriedly in a mystic shell, and when the explosions clear, she finds herself unharmed.

X: Whew--

Then she vanishes screaming into the rift of nonreality, obliterated from existence by the hole that the Omega Reich bullet-missiles punctured in the universe around her.

Lo blows a puff a smoke from her pistol and twirls it before holstering it again.

Archadmiral Lo: Serves her right.