In NeS1 Post 78 Antestarr catches Jerry Springer and decides to hang him over a pit of lava to see how he'll die, selling the show on pay-per-view. Gebohq the Writer gets him to stop, however, by threatening to have Antestarr in a duel against the universe's heaviest heavyweight woman called Mamma Mammoth.


*Antestarr peers at the scene below*

Antestarr: Hmm... Jerry Springer[Ext 1]? I'm sick and tired of that guy tearing up the ratings charts with random acts of violence, while innocent pay-per-view viewers like myself get ripped off.

*Antestarr pulls out what looks to be some kind of modified crossbow-on-a-rope.*


*He takes aim, and with relative ease manages to tie up Springer from his seat at the bleachers.*

Morris: ???

Antestarr: You want the ratings to catch fire? I'll show you how hot network television can be!

*He takes the bundle-o-springer and a T.V. camera, finds a nice outcropping over the molten lava, hangs Jerry from the outcropping, and sets up the camera to record the event.*

Antestarr: Now, ladies and gentlemen, for your viewing pleasure... BBQ a-la Jerry Springer! Which will happen first? Will the licking flames from the pit below burn through Jerry's bonds so that he plummets to a quick and relatively painless death? Will his inner bodily fluids boil from overexposure to heat? Will our ratings go through the roof? Only you, the viewers can decide by phoning 1-900-INDCASH, where you can contribute money towards whichever fate you prefer. These contributions will go to the poor children of earth who have no cable...

*As he drones on like a bad infomercial, the viewers are torn between the need to watch Jerry burn and the boredom of listening to his monotone voice.*

(Disembodied voice of Gebby scriptwriter): Shut up already before I have you tagged in against Mamma Mammoth, the universe's heaviest heavyweight woman!

Antestarr: Oh, sorry sir, it'll never happen again.


External References

  1. Jerry Springer article, Wikipedia.
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