NeS1 Post 691

NeS1 Post 691 opens with a Non-Story Note where Gebohq the Writer explains he will make sure his post would be easy for other Writers to follow-up. Gebohq Simon and MaybeChild are discussing how to stop the moon, upon which Ares' Colosseum currently stands, from smashing into the Earth and killing everyone. In NeS1 Post 679, Gebohq wanted to whisper his plans to save them to MaybeChild but she could only hear noises and not the actual plan. He now explains that he wants to trick DarkSide into firing a powerful ball of energy at the moon, thus slowly it and stopping it from crashing. MaybeChild points out that this would kill them all, so Gebohq opts for Plan B which is to wing it. In the Writers' Realm, the Writers head for Microsoft Headquarters in Silicon Valley, after Otter the Writer blows up the car they rented. When they enter the headquarters, they find Bill Gates has Semievil333 the Writer trapped. It is revealed that he was behind the attacks on Massassi, that led the Writers here. He then unleashes The Zone upon Massassi, to the Writers' horror. Back in the Arena, Lt Randy is being chased by "They" and has to force Semievil to duck as "They" opens fire upon them. MaybeChild finds a giant wishbone, from the Capture the Giant Chicken Bone, and she and Gebohq pull the bone to make a wish. Gebohq gets the larger half and is granted an adult magazine as his wish, to the annoyance of MaybeChild.

Post

(NSP: I'm postin already! Sheesh! Then you all better! Cuz I'm making darn-tootin' sure that it'll all be easy for you to post again. Er...theoretically anywhos. Here goes nothing...)

In the Arena, our heroes find themselves next to defeat and destruction at the hands of the evil Dream Team. Oh yeah, and near minutes from being annaliated, with the moon the Arena is on, in a planetary collision with Earth. And now, the conclusion of "Darkside and the moon".

Geb: I have a plan!

Maybe: Well what is it already?

Geb: I told you already, remember? The whole "wisper" deal?

Maybe: Oh yeah. If only I knew what "shph-ps-hpshs-phsh" meant...

Geb: Yeah, I guess you would have liked to have heard the actual plan, eh?

Maybe: Oh, just maybe. But take your time, hon! *rolls her eyes*

Geb: Yeah, so anywhos, my plan is that we get the Darkside guy really mad, and then have him pull a classic "Dragonball Z-style jump in the air and launch a huge energy ball into the ground", thus having so much power to cause the moon to stop moving towards Earth and into the opposite direction! Whadda ya think?

Maybe: Yeah, real smart. That move will kill us all, or blow the moon up, and not work at all.

Geb: Oh yeah, good point. Er, on to Plan B then: make it up as we go along.

Maybe: Riiiiiight...

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*In the realm of the writers-turned-anime, the writers find themselves standing by the VW Beetle. The writers collectively wonder how they managed to "find" where they were, seeing how they are not drunk at the moment. The writers turn to look at each other, nodded their heads, and each took out their weapons and such from the car. As they beging to trek towards the Microsoft headquarters deep within Silicon Valley, TheOtter tosses a hand grenade behinds himself. The car then, in a Die-Hard fashion, explodes with the equivilance of a small nuclear detonation.*

Otter: A little "Thank you" for the guys back at Rent-a-Car...

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*Meanwhile (NeS count: 1,294), back in the Arena...*

Randy: AHHHHHHH!!!!! They're coming after me!

Sem: Who is?

Randy: They!

Sem: They who?

Randy: They they!

Sem: Them? *pointing at the laughing man shooting with Uzis towards them*

Randy: YES! THEY!!!!

Sem: You mean them--

Randy: DUCK YOU IDIOT!

Sem: Duck? Where?

*Randy forces the both of them down as the bullets whiz over their heads.*

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*Thanks to the brilliant invention of cutscenes, the writers now "find" themselves at the entrance to the mighty Microsoft/UGO headquarters. The writers enter the lobby much like in "The Matrix", with the ominous men being no match for the anime skills of the writers. The group then proceeds to the elevator, where they wait patiently as it rises to the penthouse level, where Semievil is being held by Bill Gates.*

Phantom: *kicking down the doors, and speaking in a Russian accent* Release our friend, or taste lead, scumbag!

Gates: Oh, look at me! I'm peeing my pants....oh wait, I am peeing my pants.

*A few of hte writers giggle and snicker*

Gates: SILENCE! Or your friend will be no more.

Sem: Hey, how'd you guys know to find me here? And how'd you all know that he was behind the evil that's befallen on Massassi?

Randy: We just stopped in here actually to piss them off. We didn't know that they were--

*Geb jabs Randy in the stomach.*

Geb: --Because we're smooth like that, Sem. And all-powerful! Woo-oo-oo-oo! *waves his hands towards Gates and trying to be spooky*

Gates: Umm...right. You can't possibly be powerful enought o stop me though! START PHASE THREE!

*Red alarms begin to go off in the room.*

Gates: HA! The Zone has been unleashed upon Massassi!

Writers: *in unison* NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!...

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*In the Arena, Geb and Maybe are searching through the scrap chicken bones from earlier.*

Maybe: ....I found it!

*Maybechild lifts up a giant wishbone.*

Geb: Good for you, you want a medal? Now, take one end, and I'll take another. Then wish and pull apart....ready? Pull!

*The two pull, and Geb gets the bigger half. Instantly, the latest edition of Playboy materializes in front of Geb.*

Maybe: What the hell?

Geb: Well if I only have a few minutes before the end of life here and on earth, I might as well make good use of it.

Maybe: Out of all the things you could have wished for... *sigh*

Geb: What?

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*In the realm of the writers...*

writers: ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!......

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*In the Arena...*

Ante: Hey wait! EVERYONE STOP!

*The whole chaos that was teh game of Capture the Giant Chicken Bone stops completely in a cartoon-ish style.*

Ante: Not that I don't believe in free will or anything, but how the hell is anything happening right now? All the great writers that bring the action to our existance aren't writing at the moment, are they?

Krig: Uh-oh...me smell plot hole coming...

Oh my! It's a giant plothole! And it's sucking in everything and everyone! What will happen to our heroes now?

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*In the writer's realm...*

writers: ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Gates: Ow, my ears... I think I'm going to go change my pants now.

*Bill Gates zips outside the room. The writers all "find" themselves now rather depressed. Losien though had been busy playing with Bill Gate's personal computer: surfing the Internet and crushing her opponents in a game of JediKnight. As Gates had left the room, Losien noticed a little red light that was flashing on the CPU. Her eyes growing unnaturally large with curiosity, she pushed the little red button.*

*And out came a computer being, much like the one that had turned them anime.*

Being: Hello, I am the PC Genie. What do you wish?

*The writers smiled deviously at each other in unison, after which they all wondered how they all managed to do things in unison.*

(NSP: OK, I left this open-ended for all of you, for both the writers and the heroes. I'd suggest wrapping up teh writer's bit first, them moving with something, some theme, for the heroes, so we can get a regular posting-thing going again. Hope the open-end thing isn't too intimidating for you all, I'm just doing this because it's late for me, and I have things to do the next few days. I know you can all do it.)

~Geb